what an adventure

I had a blast last night. A friend from my city was here for some official work, we told him we’d pick him up for dinner. It had already poured heavily in the day so we thought he weather was great for an open air dinner. Picked him up and off we went. Ordered a lot of things and folks and E was also with us. Just when the first item of food made its way to our table, we heard and saw the lightning bolts. We prayed hard that it doesn’t rain for a few more minutes while we gobbled our food, but the Lord doesn’t listen at these times :p Anyways, the rain came plonk and within a minute the food was soaked and so were we. We ran for the nearest cover and hubby took E to another cover. Damn we were all shivering and I was scared that E would get wet and catch a cold. Since we couldn’t stand there forever and it didn’t look like it would stop anytime soon. Thus, we had to run to the car which resulted in us getting further soaked, but we eventually reached. And what do we see, NO HUBBY OR E IN SIGHT. Shit! I had the keys with me. I quickly got everyone inside and called up hubby. He said its pouring too hard and he cannot possibly get E to the car without soaking him. Luckily a good soul from the shops bought an umbrella and Hubby and E were under it. They reached the car and E was dry! 😀 What an adventure it was. Since we were still hungry, we got something to eat in the car, dropped that friend at his hotel and rushed home. Ah, what blessing it is to reach our cozy home J

kind of sad…

I’m kind of sad today. Been feeling like I havent paid a lot of attention to folks and that I should be spending more time with them. I’m feeling so guilty.

I finally went to the doc for my backache and he said apparently its not something serious. I need to eat well since I’m anemic and that I need to correct my posture due to all that sitting in office.

Since folks have found out this thing, they’ve been feeling like they need to help me more and more. Now we all know how it gets when one’s parents pamper us.

I’m in a whiney mood but a crying and guilty and sad kind of a whiney mood. I’m not staying home much of the time because have work and boss is being crappy. I’m feeling guilty because its like i called my folks just for babysitting and that doesnt sound right. i feel they’re bored home and there’s not much i can do about it. we took them to a hill station yesterday but is that really enough? im tired and my back is killing me so i prefer resting at home but that cant be good for them is it?

folks constantly tell me that they were prepared that they’d be home most of the time and its all good and that they are enjoying with E but guilty me, what do i do for my head?

another factor is that i know my dad is at his best when he is working, he gets sick when he is home for a long time so this adds to my guilt even more.

I think i should really take them out next week as they will be gone after that 😦 Damn 24 hours is too less to enjoy with your parents 😦

I really thinking my going home for 2 weeks vacation is a better option.

7 Deadly Sins

I’ve been tagged for the first time. Let’s see 7 Random things about me…

• I bite my nails, whenever I’m thinking something. It’s just a bad habit because the last I remember, I have pretty nails ONLY at my wedding, after that I’m done beautifying myself. These days I’ve got no nails so I’ve been cracking my knuckles. People find it so irritating but I juts cant help it.
• I’m obsessed with buying new and latest clothes. I would go to my hometown, shop till I drop and then dump all the unstitched clothes in my cupboard till the fashion goes away. If I see a new style, I HAVE to get it. The excitement just fizzles out once I get it home. This year’s resolution is that I will use all those unstitched clothes before getting any new stuff.
• I try to dress up when I’m feeling down. I will sometimes put on my best suits, a darker shade of lipstick and blow dry my hair when I’m feeling a little sick.
• I always imagine like I have a very rare and drastic disease or that I have the worst case of depression and that NO ONE understands me or cares for me. I blame Hubby for not taking care of me. The fact is that even if he does ask me to go to the doctor, I would say “It’s OK, I’m better now”. Poor Hubby!
• I always, always say a silent prayer of “Thanks to the Lord” when I see someone who is less privileged. The urge to say this prayer is much stronger now since I gave birth to this gem.
• Whenever we are out, like me and hubby and we’ve just come out of the movies, I will ask him “What next?” I never want the exciting stuff to end
• I almost always end up messing my best days with a FIGHT. Be it valentines, anniversary or birthday, I just end up crying at the end.

I tag the following:

A Baby Story

BoHeMiAn RhApSoDy

Chronicles of Dee

Why all things lead to chaos

The Song of Life

My Sunshine

If these people have already been tagged before with this one then I apologize, I’m NEW here 😉

Good times

Folks are staying,In laws gone, grandmother is getting better Alhamdulillah…

Just one catch though, E is quite frustrated on not seeing daada daadi. I hope he adjusts well to Nana Nani.

Other then that I’m having a ball, Mashallah.

Happiness and Chaos

As I wrote earlier, my folks have come to see me and oh what a joy it was! I was so so so very excited about it and I feel that it got jinxed! Like they say “meri khushi ko nazar lag gayi!” Here is how the unfortunate set of events took place.

There was still chaos in my city, we got stuck on the road to airport, but still somehow managed to get there. Then when folks landed, they said my grandmother was ill, perhaps it was food poisoning and she started vomiting just when folks were leaving. Tension! Then we called home and asked how she was doing, we found out that she had vomited again and was very weak. My father was so worried. My brother and bhabhi took her to the doctor and she was dizzy there and after a while they said she was still not tolerating food.  I felt like crying because I was torn between wanting my folks stay there, or send them back because daddi was so ill, but I stood strong. I kept telling myself all would be well, she would be fine. Plus my mother told me another thing that depressed me. She told me that my bhabhi was very much against my folks coming here because it was not convenient for her and that daddi was not their responsibility. I was hurt and upset and worried about quiet a few things:

• I was worried about my grandmother since she is very old and very weak and if she is not tolerating food then it is a thing to be scared about.
• I wanted my parents to go back so that if grandmother is missing my dad then she can get well soon.
• If my folks go back that means my baby E would be alone, which meant I would have to take off from work for at least a week. Thinking that I called my boss and got the most disheartening and disappointing response. He gave me the impression that I NEVER complete my assignments on time and I cannot be entrusted to long term assignments. WHAT??? In my almost 3 years at this place, I have NEVER delayed ANY assignment and look at his audacity when HE is the one who fails to compile the report since he is busy with PEOPLE while my data is ALWAYS at his desk on time.
• I was hurt because I felt that being a DIL, I had no problems letting my MIL and FIL go to USA for 6 whole months when I was pregnant. But my bhabhi was not letting her MIL come to meet me after 3 whole years! I was hurt because my bhabhi and I really get along and when I found out what was going on behind sweet words, I was very sad.
• I didn’t want to send E away for 10 days with my MIL and FIL because I would miss him, plus I wanted them to enjoy their time there without any responsibilities.

With so many things in mind, I broke down and cried so hard in the bathroom. I called up hubby and told him to go get the flights changed and get E’s ticket as well while sobbing. He didn’t know how to respond.

I was worried, sad, disappointed and hurt.

Update is that grandmother was given medicine to put food down, it worked and she was able to tolerate a LITTLE food. The quantity was less but if she is able to put down even a little, that is an achievement. Brother and bhabhi said no need to send parents back as daddi is improving and on bed rest. Spoke with bhabhi just now and she sounded well. ALL is well! I can’t tell you guys how relieved I am. Perhaps I am just too numb to actually feel any happiness.

Never the less I am satisfied with the present and in the future I will NEVER get worked up for anything related to my family.

Being Twenty Something

a forward…

BEING TWENTY – SOMETHING They call it the “Quarter-life Crisis.” It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn’t know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now. You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren’t exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don’t recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren’t really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you. You look at your job… and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn’t. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward. You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can’t meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you know that you aren’t a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself… and while winning the race would be great, right now you’d just like to be a contender! What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

Just a few hours…

Just a few hours left for folks to come, Im so excited! 🙂

Am I for real?

I’m so moody I feel like is it just me or is every female like me, well not every but most, ok some? J

Some days I’ll feel that I’m the luckiest female on this earth; I have a great husband, an awesome kid and an amazing family who love and support me. And I’ll feel like I can conquer the world, I’ll be great with my kid, I’ll talk a lot with the MIL and I’ll romance around with the hubby.

And then there are days like yesterday. I was dead tired by 5:00 pm, pushed myself and went shopping with MIL to get her stuff, went to community center, ran around with E with an ultra bad back ache, came home did my work for the next day, tried to put E to sleep. He wouldn’t budge, he was playing and babbling and I was unable to find his coos and gurgles amusing. I kept telling him to go to sleep politely first then a little harder. He started crying and then Hubby came in and tried to take E from me. The best thing for me to do would’ve been t o give E to him and myself to go to sleep and all would have been good. But NO! I’m not NICE, and I don’t do NICE things! I went and got my Ego in the middle and told him to get out and then he got mad and E started crying louder and it got very nasty! I finally put E down and went outside the room for half an hour while Hubby tried to put E to sleep. E still didn’t sleep. I went back inside the room and headed to bed. When hubby came to bed, I took out my angst on him and I was being so stubborn about it. I don’t know what got into me and I was hurling blames and all on him. It was really bad and I cried and cried. We were up till 2 am and coming to office was so hard. I still feel bruised from inside. We did try to make up but it was so late and it was still too ugly.

Does it happen with everyone or is it just me?

The countdown begins

I’m so glad that my folks are coming in 2 days! I’ve been married for more then  3 years and they’ve only Once been to my home and that too for a day’s visit when I got married and they came for the wedding reception held here. They didn’t even stay at my place and insisted on staying at a hotel as it was wedding time and we had guests over. They have wanted to come for a while now and something or the other just came up. Initially I was going back home once or twice a year so it was not necessary. Then mom wanted to come for my delivery but Dad just had his appendix operation the same month E was born so I insisted not to delay the operation because of my delivery and assured them that I would bring E to them as soon as I’m fit to travel, which I did. Then we invited them to E’s birthday but since my dad cannot tolerate strong winters, that idea was dropped. Finally after 3.5 years they are coming here. And to top it off my in laws are leaving for a wedding 2 days after my parents come! Can it get any better then this! J No issues with the In-laws staying here but they planned it such that they can meet their daughter while my parents meet their, plus they could take care of E and E’s mum! 😉

Fingers crossed, hope they enjoy and all goes well!

E update

The recent on E’s update is that he has recently started sleeping a little better at night Mashallah Touchwood! I sure hope I don’t jinx it. He’s still not sleeping through though, wakes up once at least but we can handle that plus hubby is the one who’s on call in the middle of the night.

The downside is that he is sleeping later these days like 11:00 – 11:30. He falls asleep on our way back home from community center at around 8:30 pm, wakes up in about 30 minutes and roams around till10:30 and whines and all.

Initially I used to whine about it to Hubby that we stay out so much and E is not getting the rest that he needs and all the sites say that your kid should be asleep by 8:00 pm to 7:00 pm and then I realized its all about what suits your kid and your households. We are a late sleeping household meaning if E sleeps at 11, then he is up with us at 8:30 am and again goes down for an hour or 2 till about 11 so as long as he is a happy and healthy baby, I think I should keep my controlling nature to myself and just go with the flow.